Сергей Дроботенко - Один день из жизни холостяка
текст песни

See a wonderful erotic dream.
Before the main climax, wake up from the alarm call.
Jump up, kick the alarm clock.
Get into the forehead of the cat.
Hear the whole truth about yourself.

Try to feel in the darkens to feel the lake of the floor lamp.
Think, pull the rope.
Understand that it was a cat's tail.
Read the dumb question in his eyes:
"Well, what did you want to light this?"

Start in the dark to make your way to the bathroom.
Take a step to the left, step on the cat.
Take a step to the right, step on the cat again.
Pity the animal - make a random jump somewhere into the darkness ...
Already landing, to understand that the cat and I think the same way.

In the bathroom, brush your teeth with shaving cream.
See linen in a basin, soaked a month ago.
It is sad to say to yourself: "Still boil?"
Want to have breakfast.
Put a pot with pasta on the stove, start searching for sausages.
Find her under the sofa. Remember that you are late.

Running out of the entrance, collide with a neighbor.

Hear from her: "Last night, your cat screamed again!"

Speaking, say: "I bathed it"

- "I also bathe my own, but he does not yell"

Speaking, say: "Maybe you are not squeezing yours? .."

On the bus ... for a long time trying to stick a rumpled coupon into the composter.
Finally, hear from the lady sitting below:

"Man! You go to me three times, but there is no sense!"

Speaking, say: "He is battered .."

Come running to work. Wipe the handle of the front door.
Remember that today is a day off.
Spit, kick the door.
Hear from the watchman a detailed route where to go further.
Square, slowly stuck home.
Remember that the pasta boil at home ...

Jump into the kitchen. Tear off the pasta from the ceiling.
Start searching for sausages. Catch the mysterious smile of the cat.
Feel hunger.
Find last year's hump in the bread.
Inappropriately recall the poster "in each hump of a Khlebobe sweat."
Squeezing the hump in place in place.
Open a book about delicious and healthy foods.
On the second page, choke with saliva.
Turn on the computer, find recipes.
Start search by words:

Cucumber + yogurt + jam + garlic.

Say the computer: "The moron itself."

Put a pan on the stove. With a trembling hand, get the last two eggs.
Step on the cat imperceptibly drawn behind.
Fall, break eggs.
Grab the cat by the neck, throw it into the refrigerator.
Grab the frying pan by the handle, burn yourself, throw it on the oilcloth ...
Hear the content of the cat from the refrigerator.
Open the refrigerator, say:

"Another hee-hee, and this will become your home!"

Tear off the pan from the oilcloth.
Take a step towards the cranes with cold water.
Glove on the egg yolk.
Throw up the pan.
Fall face in the yolk.
Look at the ceiling.
Meet face with a frying pan ...
Hear the moans of happiness from the refrigerator.
Open the refrigerator, say:

"I warned..."

Transfer the cat to the freezer, while saying:

"Now you are on Matroskin, now you are frost."

After five hours, regret, get .. defrost.
Read the route in the eyes of the cat, along which the watchman sent in the morning.
To tell:

"And you are good too ... you were castrated, and you are walking.
Do you advise, or what?! "

Find a jar in the closet with something tasty, crispy.
Give up everything at once! To end!
Catch the cat's oxed gaze ...
Read on the bank ... whiskas.

Sleep to the sofa, holding onto the tail of the cat.

Remember your first love. At the same time, do not be able to remember her name and face.
Remember how much it will hit in a week.
Remember ... who I wanted to become.
Remember ... that men do not cry ...

Fall asleep in the morning.